A man owned a small farm in Scotland. The Inland Revenue claimed he
was not paying proper wages to his staff and sent a representative out
to interview him.
‘I need a list of your employees and how much you pay them,’ demanded
‘Well,’ replied the farmer, ‘there’s my farm hand who’s been with me
for 3 years. I pay him £200 a week plus free room and board.’
‘The cook has been here for 18 months, and I pay her £150 per week
plus free room and board.’
‘Then there’s the half-wit. He works about 18 hours every day and does
about 90% of all the work around here. He makes about £10 per week,
pays his own room and board, and I buy him a bottle of whiskey every
Saturday night. He also sleeps with my wife occasionally.’
‘That’s the guy I want to talk to…the half-wit,’ says the agent.
‘That would be me,’ replied the farmer.